Homelessness (On the Back and Forth)

Sidebar:  If you got your own roof over your head, consider yourself blessed. This isn’t just a poem, this is what me and my children live with everyday. Despite all that I do, it simply is not enough to secure housing for my family and it’s getting harder and harder to keep my head on straight without losing it. I pray that the release of this poem will attract my home to me and my kids. NYC is a beast. If the Mayor wants to know why the homeless would rather choose the streets over the shelter, he can ask me and I’d tell him. I pray one day this nightmare will be over.  We deserve a roof over our heads too, from my mouth to God’s ears.

 

Homelessness (On the Back and Forth) by Too Tall Joanz©

Back to the daily
with the back and forth
The here and there
caught in between
the middle of nowhere
the center of “not yours”
on that nomadic
systematic
’til it’s automatic
back and forth
Looking for home
looking for peace
looking to release
the not-knowing
desiring to remove it
like high-heeled shoes
feet bruised
from the daily struggle of
the back and forth
using exhaustion
as my source
to keep on shuffling
’cause I must sleep
to hell with the hustling
the busting
balls
of NYC’s walls
to hell with it all!
And once again I drift
this time into dreams
and accept the not-knowing
and surrender to peace
I hope God will release
some new secret
and bless me with the memory to keep it
when I awake
for my sake
with the wisdom to recreate
my fate
show me where to plant my stake
show me my designated place
’cause everywhere I go’s no space
Imprisoned
with no position
no chance
to advance
to complete the mission
that will reap the fruits
that will bring about the vision
of HOME
so I can finally abandon the need to roam
the need to wander
the trauma of being torn asunder
from every nest
apologize for every breath
because I have no way
to make a way
which means I’m in the way
is what they say
Well say no more
no back and forth
no to and from
just welcome home
just welcome me
Lord help me please!
And though I exhale
I cannot breathe
rejection’s
darkened my direction
and I can’t see
I need your guidance
I need your peace
and if at least
no home
then give me strength
as my source
for the back and forth
Yes Lord!

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